I needed a gift for a male friend. Since men seem to like farts, I made him a Farting Poodle.
The original pattern comes from the Tacky Living website and you can get the pattern here. However, I could not find any air freshener with a flat top, so I went with Lysol. The PDF below has been modified to fit a Lysol can.
Farting Poodle on Scribd
When my husband and I were first married, we adopted a kitten from the neighbors across the street. A cat had arrived at their home and had her litter in their shed. It was a cute little guy - part siamese and who knows what else. I prepared a box for it to sleep in with a thick warm blanket and a wind-up clock to mimic mama's heartbeat.
Well, the kitten wouldn't have any of it and we spent our nights with him climbing up onto the bed and promptly putting him back in the box. One night, he managed to evade our grasp as we were both asleep and he curled up on the pillow above my husband's head.
I was startled awake by my husband jumping up out of bed. He was yelling and flapping his arms around screaming that the kitten had peed on his head. He didn't feel it until he tried to bury it in his hair. I was afraid for the kitten so I scooped it up to protect it. I told my husband to stop flailing around and go take a shower.
So, there's the setup.
We're now a few months down the road and the holidays are here. I spent a week making goodies - cookies, fudge, cakes. I had a heckuva time keeping my husband away from it all as most of the goodies were intended to be gifts. Not that I was all that successful, mind you.
The cat also has a name now - Spartacus. He was a bit of a fraidy-cat so the name was definitely a joke. We gave up on Spartacus sleeping in his box and resigned to having him sleep with us. He would sleep between us just to let us know he was in charge of the bed.
One morning, I wake up and throw back the covers to find something flat and brown on the sheet between us. I panicked as I immediately thought the cat had pooped in the bed. I'm trying to be quiet as I get up so I don't wake up my husband. I was in no mood for yelling. I did not succeed in my attempt and my husband woke up. I resigned myself to having a rough morning and tell him to not move as there's something in the bed that I need to clean up.
And then...
He looks down, sees the flat brown poop, peels it up from the sheet and PUTS IT IN HIS MOUTH! While I'm gagging up last night's dinner, he starts to laugh. He had snuck into the goodies and had brought some fudge to bed to munch on. Obviously, he fell asleep and dropped the fudge and evidently, someone rolled over on it to flatten it out.
